Jackie Duarte is a widow. She’s also an erotic romance writer. Things may get tough at times what with raising four youngsters ranging from eighteen to twelve, especially when one has ADHD/ODD, but Jackie’s relatively happy. Of course, there is the fact that her deceased husband, Vance, has turned up in her subconscious, explaining he’s been appointed her guardian angel and carrying on a running and sometimes ascerbic commentary which only she can hear, but—hey! Life’s never perfect, and now Vance is paying more attention to her than he did during the last five years of their marriage.
Jackie’s life takes a turn for the better (or worse depending on how she wants to look at it) when her oldest daughter Olivia decides to nominate her for the reality show “Perfect Mate.” There’s one difference about this bit of entertainment, however. Jackie gets to meet the bachelors but the kids get to pick their new dad. Suddenly, Jackie’s in the spotlight more than she wants to be. Sure, she’d like to have another man in her life, but this way? In only five weeks? Still, thinking it’ll be good PR for her books if nothing else, she goes along, deftly evading the smarmy emcee’s clutches, and suffering the ignominy of being “made-over” for her on-air appearances and having a camera crew trailing her step. Some of the men she meets are marvelous, some should have been dropped in the nearest garbage can on the way in, but eventually only two receive the “Rose” and are asked to remain: Randall who’s suave, handsome, and very, very rich, and Gary, who’s more down to earth, and has a country home that used to be the family farm.
At this point, an unexpected element emerges when Doug Applebaum suddenly appears as a challenger. Vance’s best friend and the shoulder Jackie has learned to lean on since her bereavement (although sometimes she doesn’t consider herself bereaved enough with Vance offering constant mental gibes), Doug has loved Jackie for years but is too shy to tell her. The fact that he’s not on her educational level, and is several years younger than she has kept him from making a move, so being there when she needed him always seemed to be enough. Now, two very eligible men are on the inside track with Jackie and in a few weeks, one will be taking her away…permanently. So Doug has to get into gear, shake off his shyness, and prove he’s the man for her…and he’d better hurry, because time is running out and show time and Jackie’s decision is getting closer...and it looks as if she’s already made up her mind...
MY OPINION: This is a hilarious book. In spite of some factual errors, such as the fact that azaleas don’t have thorns and 1984 wasn’t written by Ray Bradbury, the behind-the-scenes slaps at reality shows offer enough laughs to ignore the inaccuracies. The host is a jerk, some of the participating family members can only be described as “relatives from Hell”, and the question of whether or not a woman can actually be happy being wooed by a man with cameras capturing every whisper is answered in no uncertain terms. There are some serious, even violent moments such as when Doug’s psychotic ex-wife gets into the act, and some embarrassing ones when Jackie is snubbed by Randall’s daughters, but it’s all done in a wildly hyperbolic manner. In fact, everything is exaggerated to a manic degree! Heck, if the real reality shows were this good, I might watch some of them! The cast of characters are wild enough to have come from a cable-TV sitcom, but to my mind, Jackie’s silent conversations with Vance, going on simultaneous to what is actually happening in her life are one of the best parts of the story. Thank you, Elaine for a wild and wonderful tale!
This novel was supplied by the author and no remuneration was involved in the writing of the review.
